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With
so many cherished family members and close friends,
it can sometimes be hard to find a way to include
them all in your day. Of course, just having them
there with you makes your day extra special. But
for some brides and grooms, having all of the
nearest and dearest play a part adds extra meaning.
So
for those who are trying to find ways to include
not just your best friend but five other best
friends as well as three sisters, a brother, two
nieces, and a nephew, we've come up with a list
of the many roles -- almost all of them optional
-- that you may choose to use in your ceremony.
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Maid
of Honor.
Usually one close friend or sister is chosen, but sometimes
brides choose to have two Maids of Honor. Perhaps the
most honored role a friend can play, the Maid of Honor
(or Matron of Honor, if married) stands by the bride
during the ceremony and is usually involved in throwing
the bridal shower and bachelorette party. When a bride's
best friend is a male, sometimes they nonetheless choose
to have him play this role. In these cases, the role
can be referred to as the Honor Attendant.
Best
Man.
Like the Maid of Honor, usually the groom's best friend
or brother is chosen to play this honored role. Also
like the Maid of Honor, more and more grooms are choosing
to include two Best Men, especially when one of them
lives out of town and is unable to perform the duties
inherent in the role.
Bridesmaids.
Some brides choose to have only a Maid of Honor, but
most choose to have at least one and sometimes as many
as eight or more bridesmaids.
Junior
Bridesmaid.
For those too young to be a full-fledged bridesmaid
and too old to be a flower girl, the junior bridesmaid
is a perfect role. Most often the junior bridesmaid
walks down the aisle unaccompanied by a groomsmen, but
can be so accompanied if your wedding parties are uneven.
Groomsmen.
Like bridesmaids, the number of groomsmen can range
from zero to eight or more. These are the men closest
to the groom, whether they are brothers, best friends,
cousins, or a combination.
Flower
Girls.
Usually filled by a favorite niece or cousin, the flower
girl is generally between the ages of four and eight.
She follows the bridesmaids down the aisle, carrying
a bouquet or basket of flowers. Usually, brides choose
to have between one and three flower girls.
Ring
Bearer.
Like the flower girl, the role of ring bearer is often
filled by a favorite nephew or cousin, usually between
the ages of four and eight. The ring bearer carries
a pillow with the wedding rings attached (although many
couples attach faux wedding rings, available at party
supply shops, to the pillow and entrust the real rings
to the Best Man). This is a very important role and
for a smooth ceremony, the ring bearer should be someone
who is comfortable in front of an audience.
Ushers.
There are usually at least two ushers (almost always
men), who escort guests to their seats. Sometimes it
is the groomsmen who fill the roles of the ushers, but
if the groom has a lot of men in his life, be they brothers
or just good buddies, these roles can be filled by non-wedding
party members.
Guest
Book Attendant.
This role can be filled by either a man or a woman.
The guest book attendant stands next to the guest book
and shows guests where to sign and answers any questions
the guests may have. Sometimes, the guest book attendant
may also accept wedding gifts on behalf of the bride
and groom.
Singer/Musician.
If you have a talented friend or family member, why
not showcase them before an audience? Ask them to perform
either during the ceremony or at a point during the
reception. Whether soprano or baritone, guitarist or
flautist, the addition of a musician can only enliven
the day's proceedings.
Reader.
Often, the ceremony will include one or two readings,
either from Scripture or from a favorite poem of the
bride and groom's. You can either have one, two, or
even three readers, depending upon the number of passages
being read (or you can have one reader read all of the
passages). Be sure that when selecting your reader(s),
the chosen individual has a voice that carries well.
The beauty and meaning of a passage read aloud is more
effective when your guests can hear it properly.
Officiant.
Finally, there is the officiant. Just because neither
friend nor family is a priest, rabbi, city official,
or sea captain doesn't mean they can't become qualified
to marry you. While untraditional, it is nevertheless
perfectly legal to have a friend act as your minister,
provided that they have taken the necessary steps.
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